Trusting Your Gut
Do you yell at characters in horror movies who go into dark basements instead of escaping through outside? There’s always that one person in a horror movie that says, “We shouldn’t be doing this,” but defies their instinct. Sadly, we’re not all that different. We’re pretty off when it comes to trusting our gut in normal situations (nevermind a masked killer and his chainsaw quickly approaching)! In this post, I’ll share three reasons why we ignore our intuition.
Are You Connected to Your Intuition?
Half of the problem is that our connection to our intuition broken, and we often can’t hear it. You can’t act on or ignore something you’re unaware of. Read this post on how to strengthen your connection to your intuition.
The first time I recall acting on my intuition was upon finding a receipt for my engagement ring that my toxic high school sweetheart had for me. It wasn’t the first time I had this feeling. However, it was the first time I was in full alignment with what it was telling me.
My intuition saved my life. If intuition is such a gift, why are we so quick to want to return it when we receive it?
School Teaches us to Embrace Rigid Confines.
In my book, I list knowing that mistakes don’t equal failure as one of the nine essential habits of successful self-aware people. They break away from the pass or fail indoctrination we learn beginning in elementary school. We start to think in these narrow terms that something either is or it isn’t.
Couple with learning that we need tangible evidence, facts, and proof for something to be legitimate, and it’s easy to see why we ignore what our intuition is telling us. We want hard evidence because that’s what smart people look for. You wouldn’t want to be irrational. So you see the situation you know you shouldn’t be in through to the end. Well, at least you get your solid evidence.
In my eleven-year narcissist abuse relationship with my ex, my vivid dreams of him cheating, finding inappropriate messages, and witnessing highly questionable behavior weren’t enough to break ties. I felt like I needed to walk in on him doing something with someone else before making a decision. Even then, I’m sure I’d convince myself that my eyes were lying.
Comfort Zones Breed Complacency
The second reason we ignore our intuition is that we’re comfortable in our current situation. What’s the special ingredient that comfort zones have that keeps us hostage?
Predictability. Comfort zones are one of the most suffocating, toxic places one can exist. The cruelest part about the stickiness of predictability is that predictability doesn’t give a shit if you’re used to emotional and physical abuse, or if you’re used to having everyone kissing your ass. Predictability is a hell of a drug, and we seem wired to chase that high.
The third reason we ignore our intuition is that we don’t trust ourselves. The combination of low self-awareness and negative self-talk wreak havoc. We live with the fear of failure from school age and it becomes the kryptonite to many of our dreams and ambitions.
Depending on your upbringing, you may have dealt with overbearing parents who fought to micromanage your life (what color dress to wear, how to style your hair, what school and major). Conversely, you may have had parents who left you to your own decision making. Perhaps a slew of wrong choices makes you freeze in place, rather than take decisive action. Either way, you get to a place where you don’t believe you’re capable of making the necessary changes.
If you’re like me (a survivor of physical and emotional abuse), the trust issues you have with yourself run deeper. We’ve bee methodically conditioned not to trust ourselves. When someone feeds you lies about who you are for long enough, you start to believe it. Your self-talk echoes theirs. Being talked out of your self-awareness and self-esteem makes trusting a sense that you can’t prove impossible.
Are you connecting and listening to your intuition? Creating a life where your decision-making process is lead by self-awareness and intuition creates allows fulfillment in your life to happen as effortlessly as breathing. Check out this post on using intuition for better self-care.
Has your intuition been screaming for your attention lately?